Saturday, December 22, 2007

The email.

I love seeing the hub's email address in my inbox. Serendipity. It's a very rare thing cuz usually he calls but today there it was when I woke up this morning.

At first it's business as usual.yada yada. then he ends..." Love u and the pumpkin so much cant wait untill im home again" Little things that make me tear up, I do that a lot now over stupid things. I really wish he was home and it totally sucks that Christmas is days away.

That's how my day started.

Then I went to work.

Then got better, cuz I had starbux..
then worse,cuz customers are stupid,
then better, one of my favorite jarhead customers just got back from Japan and he's ridiculously entertaining.... then I go home.

I picked up the pumpkin. My hours this time of year are so crazy I leave her overnight at the sitters. I never get to see her anymore.... sometimes I think that she thinks the babysitter is her mom. She screams when I pick her up to go home.. I know it's cuz she's tired but it still hurts my feeling a bit.

Then I think about the hub and how sad he gets when I tell him that she walked for the first time and he wasn't there. . When he called to just talk to her and he heard her say hi.."Was that her? " he asks, I say yes and tell him she's been saying hi for a few days now... he was so surprised. ( He missed both milestones by less then 2 weeks)I know he worries that she won't know who he is when he gets home. She'll be almost 2 1/2 then.... and he'll have missed alot. I wan't to promise him that she will and that it'll be fine, so I do, but I'm not so sure.

Anyways, I take the punkin home, as soon as I put her in the pack-n play off to sleep she goes. Here I sit, another night alone. I watch an old episode of House I DVR'd from last week, check the myspace (yes I have a myspace and no you can't know what it is) leave some comments. then write this.

That's my night.... I think I'll go make some tea.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love you baby and I get tears in my eyes when I know how sad your are but hang tough, I am always here for you and Pumpkin. Merry Christmas from me and The Tin Lizzy.